Tuesday, May 4, 2010

How the Habs can beat the Pens

Been a while. Too busy hiding my head in shame via my last post.

First and foremost this was blatently stolen inspired by Habs Laughs who does basically what I want to do but actually updates and actually is funny. I also wanted to make this post prior to game one, so I'd like to thank the Habs and Pens for keeping the series tied.
That said


How the Habs can beat the Pens!
Keep key players like Andrei Markov healthy

Have Carey Price constantly flash his World Juniors Medal at Marc-Andre Fleury from the bench

Show Sidney Crosby his old Habs memmorobelia.

Remind Evgeni Malkin how he really should be helping his new friendship blossom with Alexander Ovechkin

Play better than them (credit: Habs Laughs)

Point out that history will remember their team this year better as a favourite who lost to an underdog than a team making its third of seven straight stanley cup final appearances

Convince them Hal Gill is still on their team - Shouldn't be hard as he was still skating his victory lap during training camp.

Convince Winnepeg Jets and Phoenix Coyotes fans to assault the guy who suggested they rip off the white-out

Ask Mario Lemiuex to start hitting up Crosby for back-rent

Get Markov healthy enough to become the second one with that last name to give the penguins a salute

Hire David volek as a motivational speaker

Raise the drinking age in Quebec to 21, give the Penguin's bench a liquor license, bar a third of their roster and head coach from entering.

Block shots without deflecting them into the net

Let Cammalleri do his thing

Win a game at home and convince the Penguins they need a police escort to 'keep off the heat'

Convince refs to call dives against both teams.

1 comment:

  1. Impersonate the Pittsburgh goalie coach, and insist to Fleury that he play the puck.

    Point out to Jordan Staal that playing with a bone sticking out of your foot is a bad thing.

    Find all the queasy members of the Penguins, and point out aforementioned injury.

    Slip Fleury laxatives through ingeniously labeling them as 'bon-bons'.

    Show Tyler Kennedy a picture of himself.

    Do the same to Ponikarovsky.

    Tell Hal Gill that Penguins are good eating, creating a perpetual 5 on 4 for the Canadiens.

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